I now know how it is to hear a string of "can you do this, can you do that" and can understand it now when E gets irritated on the occasions that I have asked him to do/get something.
Adding please, we both thought, would differentiate "can you" (a directive) from "can you please"(a request). But it still comes across as an order.same with replacing "can" with "could"
So my question is, how do you ask for help, provide clear directions on what is needed, and not come across as demanding or bossy?
If you've been following along for a while, you know I am horrible at asking for help and often take on waytoomuch. But if asking for help comes across as abrasive...I'm not likely to ask.